Daddy Daddy Please don’t touch me, how to traumatize an old man 2!


The best thing about good friends is that they can tolerate a great joke.  My friend cPat is one of those people, he is often the one pulling the prank, but he can take a joke too.   cPat and I partied together for a period of about 9 months while my boyfriend was doing time in prison.  On one such occasion we were partying at his friends place over in West Seattle.  On our way to his apartment we stopped by the local convenience store.  cPat lived about a block from Darrin’s new place.  This was his lil hole int he wall haven.  As we were in the back of the store getting beer, I thought it would be funny to make cPat uncomfortable.  I then hollered as loud as I could “Daddy, Daddy, please don’t touch me there, it just isn’t right.”  cPat turned 7 shades of purple and told me he was going to kill me.

I, being the devil that I am was very proud of myself.  As we stood in line that clerk kept looking over at us.  When it was finally our turn to purchase she whispered to me, “he’s not really your father is he?”  I can only take a joke so far, so I replied, “NO, and he never touched me either!”  She laughed so hard she swallowed her gum and told me that was the best joke ever.

For a minute there I thought cPat really was going to strangle me when we got back in the car.

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